Houston, we have a problem...

So, remember that gig that I was so boosted about with the lady I'd been working with since early July? The one who wanted the really dramatic look? yeah, CANCELLED. We had her trial, which didn't go exactly as planned for a number of different reasons. She cut her hair, which I was not prepared for *totally and completely my fault. I should've been prepared for her to show up bald. That's the mark of a great artist, i think.*.

Oftentimes, I am so head over heels in love with the idea of giving the bride exactly what she wants, I'm unprepared to let my aggressive lioness take over when it becomes clear that she may actually have no earthly idea what she wants. When we met, I sensed that this particular bride is one who is not strong in making decisions. She tends to waffle back and forth..with most everything. So, during the trial, when i noticed that she needed me to take the upper hand and make decisions for her, I should have done that. Instead, I waffled with her, naive to her signals of "help me decide" and "I just don't know what I want!!", lol. Yeah, I totally missed those. I became Vanessa Bell-Calloway in "Coming To America" (i blew it) with the "it's whatever you like" and "whatever lip color you prefer is what I'll give you". *laughing*

I don't think it's my job to hold your hand, and tell you what makeup you want. You know what you want to look like on your wedding day, there's no way I can tell you if you like your red lip or not. That's why I'm horrible at sales jobs. You either want it or you don't, I'm not gonna sell you on it. You either like it or you don't, ma'am...be an American; make a choice! (i stole that quote from my favorite psych teacher from Varina High School, who also happened to be the varsity baseball coach. shout out to Coach Steele.) That's also why I spend countless hours with brides, going back and forth over various looks and designs. I look at her face, study it's structure, choose what look I THINK will be right for her, send her (first) my suggestions, take (second) her personal preferences, and then she accepts or rejects (third) what she likes and dislikes. We're not curing HIV, but it's still serious enough that I take the time to do it. It's important so we don't waste more time than necessary. But, because this is America, and because being in the service industry--service and beauty, for that matter--I learned a great lesson: sometimes, i WILL have to tell people what they want. And then, I'll have to give it to them.

My inability to read her "waffling" cues, take hold of them, and be firm with her had me at her house for 8.5 hours. Yep. You read it correctly. I bet i won't ignore those damn cues again. Hmph.

Between her hair flop which took two hours and still ended up wrong, her makeup which actually came out great, her sister's makeup, and her mom's makeup (all great as well), I spent my whole day with this great family of women, helping them decide what should be and what would not be her wedding day beauty design.

At the end, I collected my fees, deposits, and contracts, and I left, with the promise that I would see them bright and early the following Saturday morning....exactly 7 days later.

On Tuesday morning, she called to cancel. *gas face*

What went wrong? She assured me that it had nothing to do with my skill level, my professionalism, or anything of that nature. Simply put: her mom has a friend who owns a salon and wanted to contribute. So, she offered to do the bridal party's hair for the wedding, and as a bonus, threw in makeup for free. "But, you already paid your NON-REFUNDABLE deposit! What's happened??" Yeah, doesn't matter...thank you for all your time, though. I feel really bad, but sorry. Thanks. bye!" Of course, it wasn't as cold as that; her apology seemed genuine and heartfelt. But, either way, that's one face I don't get to add to my portfolio. ANOTHER face, it seems, since it's like pulling TEETH trying to get a bride to send you pictures of her after her wedding. I got to keep the money (yay) but i didn't get to do the work. Only problem with that is, i don't work in makeup for the money; I love makeup as my work, and the money comes as a bonus. I love doing makeup, and when I can't, it saddens me. Oh, TRUST AND BELIEVE, i took that check STRAIGHT to Citibank when I left her house, lol, so there was never a question of returning the money. But, the cancellation stung for a day or two. First I was angry. Then I felt hurt, and rejected. But, then, I got over myself and made the choice to not take it personally. The selfish angry bitch in me wanted to wish horrible things for choosing someone else for her wedding makeup, after i'd put in so much time and communication with her. But, the grown and sexy, mature and professional Strong Woman in me went ahead and silenced that little girl, lol.

I'm sure her wedding went fabulously, and I wish her nothing but the very best for her big day, as I do for each and every bride I meet. I haven't spoken with her since that day, and I probably never will. I am still glad, though, to have met her and had this experience as an artist. This is the kind of thing that will happen at some other time in life, on a much larger scale, on a higher level, when i'm working as a pro artist full time; I need to be prepared for such things. there will be plenty of times when, as a freelance artist, a client will reject my prices, reject my services, reject (gulp) my skills, reject my attitude, reject my appearance, reject me directly...for reasons I may or may not agree with. Its the nature of the beast. And today, thanks to my last Saturday bride, I'm ready to strap on my "thanks but lets keep it moving" slingbacks....and walk it out.


Eyes to the skies, loves!

Beautiful Dae

What a long day

Mondays are usually crazy days, whether you're working your day job or your side hustle. Either it's crazy busy, the phones won't stop ringing, customers are extra needy because of how little work they did the previous Friday, bosses are extra demanding, everyone has a problem, no one has an answer, and the paperwork just continues to stack higher and higher. Sigh.

I need a vacation from Mondays.

So, up this weekend, I'm meeting with a bride who I met through www.brides.com.
She lives in Texas but is traveling back to her home state (MD) to have her wedding. The great news is that she's already *technically* married so alot of the stress and pressure and nervousness that alot of brides-to-be experience about the impending MARRIAGE, she's already gotten out of the way. The bad news is that, just like every other beautiful bride to be, she's still got a wedding to plan....just as if she weren't already married. There's still the caterer, the venue, the reception venue, the florists, the dress, the invitations (and the family), the cake, and, oh dear God, the hair and makeup. Enter MOI, lol.

Originally she'd planned to only have makeup done. She'd already gotten her hairstylist taken care of. This was, oh, maybe a month and a half ago. Fast forward to this past weekend. Bad news! Hairstylists oh-so-rudely cancel at the last minute, with not so much as a "oops, our bad! *sniff, sniff*" Nothing. Just "yeah, we're not gonna make it out there. But you can pack up your whole bridal party and bring them here at 5am if you'd like...yeah, sucks to be you, ma'am." OH NO she ditn't!! RUDENESS!! Again, enter moi. Some folks make my job so easy. And for that, I must thank the Goddess of hair and makeup, Alandriadite, for smiling upon me and all the other ready willing and able beauty stylists who eagerly pick up the pieces of these broken doves we know as "left high and dry at the last minute" brides. Thank you, Goddess Alandriadite. You are truly too kind.

Anyway, i get a call from her, panicking, saying that she is in desperate need of a new hairstylist for her wedding day because of a cancellation. Hmmmm...desperate need, you say? New hairstylist, you saaaaay? CANCELLATION you say?! Why, as a matter of fact, i DO know of a hairstylist who just HAAAAPPENS to be available on the very same day that you're getting married. Let me check with her and see if she's interested....

*standing to the side, scratching my temple, pretending to contemplate my interest*

Ok, she's definitely interested! Let me go ahead and get that. Of course, I'll do it for you, dear! Let me just send you the prices, you send me some pics, and we'll re-do your contract. Easy day.
So now, on top of the original makeup contract, I now have a revised hair and makeup contract worth a little more, i've come to the aid and rescue of a harried bride to be so she can now worry less about one less thing, and I'm a complete and total hero.

*brushing my shoulders off* It's all in a day's work. Hmph.

We've already picked out her makeup look:






















And now, it's time for hair. My tasks this week are to compile hair suggestions and email them to her. She says she wants spiral curls which, though it's a relatively easy style, is time consuming...so we're gonna do that at her trial this week. I went and got some great new styling products and tools, so I'm all set for now. I will let you know what pics I come up with as far as suggestions go....and of course, I'll have pics for you all after her trial so you can see how it turns out. I, for one, think this look is gonna be great with spiral curls. I can't WAIT! This is such a great way to end my crazy Monday, I almost forgot what today is already, lol. I truly truly love my job, and I wish this kind of career joy and passion for each and every one of you, even the haters. You deserve joy too.


Good night, my loves.

Beautiful Dae