blessed herbs

I debated for a while over whether or not I would blog about this because it's kinda...well, actually, its really...welll...its friggin gross. Ugh.

About a year ago, I first learned about colonics and colon cleansing. One of my fellow DC Sista Girls mentioned searching for a good colon cleanser, and I was clueless so i headed over to "i don't know what the hell that means so lemme go look it up" central. Yep. www.google.com.

Turns out, the colon is where all the *gag* waste from your food is stored inside your body. And here I am, stupid, thinking that when I, ahem, go to the bathroom...I got rid of everything in storage. NOT so. Ha! not even CLOSE.

After sifting through many websites that promised to give me a bright and shiny brand spanking new freshly cleaned colon *double gag*, I landed at www.blessedherbs.com.
This site offered a Colon Cleansing Kit and an Internal Cleansing Kit. They both sounded way too much for me, but I continued to read on. I honestly didn't realize that colon cleansing was so involved. Admittedly, I had no idea what the colon was, or what it actually looked like or what its function was prior to that time. Just ignorant for no damn reason. *shakin my head*
Once I saw those pictures (if you went to the site, you know which pictures I'm talkin about), I promptly x'd out of that site and immediately decided not to revisit any time soon. Absolutely gross. Blech.

Now, understand that, at this time I was about 20-25 pounds lighter, way more active, and not quite as mature as I am today *smiling* so it was easy for me to ignore the concept of my needing a colon cleanse.

Today? Not so much. not at ALL.

Lol, I come from a very Southern family that does NOT believe in anything but the healing power of the Lord Jesus Christ. So, if you got a problem, pray about it. Doctors, not so much. Alternative medicines, definitely not. Herbs, Reiki, Yoga, Holistic therapy...maaaan, HELL naw. You live, you eat what you want, you do what you want, you work hard, pray hard, then you die. Period. Needless to say, my family is (and for those that have passed, was) riddled with all types of diseases, most of which they refuse to get treated for. Personally, I don't take medicine unless I think I'm dying. Seriously, I just don't like to take it,especially pills. i almost always choke on them; liquid medicine tastes disgusting, too. Yes, it's childish, I'm aware. It won't change. let it go. No really, let it go, lol.

So, a few months ago, when it became increasingly more difficult to ignore the heaviness I felt when walking, running (yeah, right), climbing stairs, or even playing tag with my son...I knew it was time to think outside of the box and pay closer attention to my body. I've always been one to take my good health for granted. I figure, we all gotta die of something, right? (shuddup) But, I hated that feeling. After i moved into my new apt, it was a BITCH gettin up that hill to the door everyday. Bringing in the groceries felt like double the chore it ALREADY is...so sometimes, some of them damn groceries got left in the car, lol. (shuddup)
Anyway, so off I go, looking for a way to really get moving. Another of my DCSGs is a personal trainer, so I spoke with her about what I should do. Of course, she told me I needed to exercise more, get my metabolism moving, etc. I wanted to, but I was still filled with excuses...so I never made it to any of her classes. In my own defense, I was really busy at the time; plus I didn't have the money. **Big shout out to Lisa Lofty A.K.A. LOBO of LOBO Fitness www.lobofitness.com **
I put it off for another few months, and then finally, at the end of the summer...I went back to that website. Big Sigh. I went. I looked at those pictures. I read the testimonials. Again. The Cleanse requires a 5 day liquids-only fast. Wait...What? For 5 whole days, i can't eat? I CAN'T EAT?? Nope. Not ready. I'm not ready. But...what about this heaviness each time i walk? Its not gonna go away on it's own.

*here is where you insert the face you make the moment you realize you have to do something you really don't want to do, are not even sure you're capable of doing...but have to anyway, not because someone else is making you do it, but because the potential consequences of not doing it may be too scary for you to deal with.

Yep. Insert that face, for me, riiiiiiight.......here: ________.

Boo. Hisssss...

Luckily this time, they'd made it virtually IMPOSSIBLE not to get the kit. Not only was it on sale, down from 189.00 to 89.50 (i love recession pricing), but NOW they're offering to practically give it to me for free! If I purchase the colon cleansing kit, and I don't acheive the results it promises, I pay nothing but the shipping it cost to get it to me. Wait....What? I was already skeptical to begin with...now they're daring me to get it. Taunting me, even. The bastids.
Hmph.

So, I order the colon cleansing kit on Friday. It arrives on Tuesday. The instructions say that I have to do a 3 day Pre-Cleanse to prepare my body, which is more comforting. i'm to gradually decrease my food intake each day, until I finally (big gulp) go to liquids-only on the 4th day.
For a moment, I paused. Was I really ready to commit to this? I know it may seem to-some of you-that I'm making a huge deal out of this...but I'm a food addict. Seriously. Food is my vice, my crutch, my one and only comfort in this life that can get abominably dreary at times. The only way I'd be willing to give up food is if I were trapped in a cave guarded by clowns covered in camel crickets and toads on an island surrounded by brown pirahna-infested water that may or may not be harboring the Swine Flu....and the food was stored in a helicopter that so happened to be dangling a rescue ladder OVER the brown water. Its that serious. I mean, it must be eat or death. I felt I couldn't even give up food if Isayah's life depended on it...because if it came down to it, and I got hungry enough, i MIGHT just eat HIS ass if I had to. So, could I really conquer my bad eating habits enough to make this mental commitment. I've always been aware that its all mental; I've just never cared enough to give up the one thing that makes me just as happy, if not happier, than doing makeup in order to make that mental commitment.

But, the kit was already there. So, I had to do it.

BIG SIGH.

Read here for the day to day breakdown...